Break to repent and ask for forgiveness

This week has been the worst (or best depending if you like roller coasters) ride of my emotions this year. Not just with planning for 1 single day, but there's also life to handle as well and life has not come out where I want it to be. Note the "I want."

Last night God and me spent some quality time together wrestling through my emotions. After much wrestling, God helped me to repent of my unbelief about Him being good and loving me and my pride of everything being me-centered. This summer I've been reading through John Piper's God is the Gospel.

I don't have the book with me to get the passage that I have underlined, highlighted and dog-eared, but I did find a similar one to it from the study book guide from Desiring God Ministries which really summarizes the goal of the book.

Most people feel loved when they are made much of, that is when they are placed at the center of all that is valuable and worthy of honor and affection. This is why the love of God seems so foreign and strange to people. Since God is the ultimate good of the gospel, he doesn’t make much of us, per se, putting us at the center of all that is valuable and worthy of honor and affection. Rather, he enables us to see and savor him as that which is most valuable and worthy of honor and affection.

When I get the book near to a computer, I will post the passage, because it fleshes this summary out.

This morning I wrote a note to encourage the other team members of 1 single day. Alot of the prayer is based off of what God was speaking to me the night before. I pray the note will encourage you as well.

Remember God is aware of what is going on and it's not a surprise to Him (thank goodness!) This conference is about Him, not about ourselves and he is full of unceasing grace that he desires to pour out on us in this last week. If it weren't for trials and bumps in the road, then grace and mercy would not be as sweet. Let's not doubt God's grace to meet us in every circumstance. Let us run to the cross for forgiveness and repent of unbelief, full of confidence that Christ's death paid for all our sins and grants us FULL access to the Father, whom is TRULY ALL our joy and peace. Help us Father as we wrestle with the details and changes that we see that this wrestling that you have ordained is so that we would find our rest in you, which is the best thing for us.

Side note: I don't want to deceive myself or others out there, but everything I've written in the post and really anything in this blog, is really all due to the mercy of God. It may seem that I've really turned the corner on my sin and pride, but it was still there in the morning and still here with me even now. I need to keep reminding myself and need others to remind me of the truths of God.

Toodles!